Emotional Labor: A Hidden Source of Exhaustion in Everyday Life
The fast-paced work environment, strained relationships, and suppressed emotions – all these forms of “emotional labor” can leave you feeling drained during the day and unable to sleep well at night. Popular podcast hosts Tsai Yuzhe and Tsai Jiaxuan of “Wow Psychology” combine neuroscience-based research with practical exercises to help you overcome mental and physical exhaustion, improve your daily routine, declutter your mind, and regain a fulfilling life.
One day, Wei Qiang had to lead an important project meeting where the discussions were filled with controversy. A key business partner expressed strong dissatisfaction with certain aspects of the project. Wei Qiang felt immense pressure but had to maintain composure and a smile during the meeting to preserve good business relations.
Throughout the meeting, he patiently listened to the partner’s opinions and responded with positive and kind solutions. After the meeting, Wei Qiang felt completely drained. Before he could catch his breath, he received a call from an important client expressing strong dissatisfaction with a recent product promotion activity. Despite feeling frustrated inside, Wei Qiang had to remain calm and professional at work, patiently listen to the client’s feedback, and promise a prompt resolution.
Does this scenario sound familiar to you?
Emotional labor, which consumes mental energy comparable to physical labor, is prevalent in jobs like customer service, hospitality, and teaching. Even in corporate settings, there are numerous emotionally taxing situations, such as lengthy and unproductive meetings, meeting the demands of superiors, clients, or colleagues. Aside from draining our mental faculties, the emotional strain at work is often overlooked but can significantly affect our overall well-being.
Looking at emotional control from a self-regulation perspective, one can see it as a taxing behavior. Imagine a childhood game where you must resist laughing, even if someone tickles you, like touching your feet or back without any reaction. Or think of adolescent social games where eye contact between boys and girls must be maintained without shifting focus or showing any expression.
Recalling these scenarios, one realizes that emotional control can be exhausting. In the workplace, especially in service industries like food service or flight attendants, employees not only have to meet their job requirements but also frequently encounter diverse and sometimes unreasonable customer requests. They must maintain a smile even if they are inwardly discontent.
Many people mistakenly believe that only physical labor leads to exhaustion, but high levels of emotional labor involve more than just plastering on a smile. It also includes suppressing true feelings, which can drain energy and mental strength, impacting psychological well-being.
In fact, any job involving interaction with others entails emotional labor. It is not only a part of work but also a challenge. We must not only maintain professionalism but also handle our own emotions. When we wear a mask and face others with a smile, suppressing our true emotions, it can lead to inner conflict and a sense of discomfort in the long run.
Many may not realize that daytime emotional labor can even affect sleep. A study collected data on emotional labor levels and perceptions of job security among office workers. “Job insecurity” refers to employees’ perception of the continuity of their position, whether they see themselves as short-term contract workers or holding long-term positions.
The results revealed that both emotional labor levels and job insecurity affect nighttime sleep quality. When these factors combine, the negative impact on sleep quality amplifies. Imagine a service industry employee facing frontline emotional labor while being a short-term contract worker – their sleep quality is likely to be significantly affected.
This highlights the interconnectedness of daytime work stress, emotional regulation, and nighttime sleep, a fact many may overlook. As emotional labor is a part of everyone’s work life, how should we mentally handle it to prevent it from draining our energy?
1. Empathy: When facing difficulties or unreasonable colleagues or clients in the workplace, one might instinctively feel angry or inclined to argue back. Understanding that these individuals may be acting out of self-protection or self-interest, rather than specifically targeting oneself, can help calm down intense emotions. Approaching conflicts with empathy helps handle work disputes calmly and learn to collaborate better with people of different personalities.
2. Focus on the Positive: Emotional labor is inevitable in any work environment. For example, sales projects may involve difficult clients. In such situations, it’s crucial not to let negative experiences with a few individuals affect our perception of the overall client group or our view of work. Try to focus on those clients who engage positively and provide constructive feedback, rather than being swayed by a few negative experiences.
3. Differentiate Individual Cases from the Overall Picture: It’s important to remember that individuals displaying abnormal behavior should not be seen as representative of the entire group. For instance, if we view the behavior of a difficult colleague or manager as the attitude of the entire department or company, the pressure we feel will increase.
Therefore, learning to differentiate individual cases from the overall situation and appropriately managing negative emotions to solve problems is crucial for maintaining psychological health and emotional stability in the workplace.