A 25-year-old woman named Grace has a unique hobby: cooking healthy meals for her husband. From making pastries and meat sauces to baking crescent-shaped pretzel bread, she enjoys it all.
Grace and her husband met six years ago when she was just 19 years old. It was love at first sight. Today, this couple and their toddler daughter live in Pennsylvania. Grace is a passionate homemaker who enjoys keeping the house clean, caring for her daughter, and cooking a variety of dishes.
She believes that her husband, who has a demanding job with long hours, deserves to be well taken care of.
Proudly displayed above her stove is a sign that reads: “I enjoy cooking for the male leader in the family.”
“Since COVID, people, especially women, have started to change their views on family,” she said. “I see more and more women embracing traditional values, including their views on marriage.”
“However, playing traditional roles in marriage is still not the norm in society. The pendulum has been swinging since the ’50s and ’60s, from ‘smashing patriarchy’ to now, more women are respecting men in their lives and accepting their leadership at home.”
Grace cooks every day and plans her shopping based on food prices to save money. She often wakes up early to prepare breakfast for her husband.
She enjoys baking. Breakfast includes crescent-shaped pretzel bread, egg custard pie, pancakes, and shoofly pie – one of her favorite Pennsylvania Dutch traditional desserts. She also prepares lunch for her husband to take to work.
As a young mother of one, she lives by traditional values, serving her family in a caregiver role. She says her husband “deserves rich meals” because he works hard for the family.
“I focus on protein, followed by carbohydrates, vegetables, and the like,” she said, using baked chicken with mashed potatoes, green beans, and homemade butter rolls as an example. “It may not be fancy, perhaps very simple food, but it focuses on whole foods and fills the stomach.”
Her husband is always appreciative.
“He is grateful, gives me a kiss after meals, and thanks me for cooking,” she said, adding that these exchanges help strengthen their marriage.
“We both understand that our jobs are not more challenging than each other’s, and we both work hard in our own ways,” she said. “We don’t play a ‘tit-for-tat’ game, we express gratitude to each other every day.”
Grace shares her journey of creating a “joyful home” online, where people respond with various emotions.
“The reactions are usually mixed, with many positive, while others are angry or shocked,” she said.
While some criticize her for becoming a “slave” for taking care of her husband, others appreciate and acknowledge her traditional way of life.
She said, “My efforts may not be seen by the outside world, but God will see, and everything I do comes from love and a desire to honor Him in daily life.”
Cooking is not the only thing Grace does for her family. She says other household chores are equally important and must be done every day. She has a “must-do” list of chores she has to complete daily: laundry, dishes, and at least three other chores.
To some extent, this young homemaker has always known she wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. It was during her sophomore year of college that this dream came true.
They got engaged in March 2019, but she postponed the wedding until May 2021 as she wanted to finish her bachelor’s degree first. At the time, she was studying speech pathology and audiology but began to realize that in the long run, this was not the path she wanted to pursue. She knew that due to the nature of this profession, she would soon become overworked and exhausted.
“I knew I didn’t want to pursue a master’s degree and clinical research on this path and wait so many years to get married and start a family,” she said.
This young woman has faced resistance from others for sticking to her traditional way of life.
“I understand that resistance comes from good intentions, but sometimes it can be hurtful,” Grace said. “It’s as if choosing to do housework is a ‘secondary’ path, or I’m ‘too smart,’ so I shouldn’t make myself foolish and ‘waste my potential.'”
For her, choosing to stay at home is more appealing than the workplace. Serving her husband and children creates sweet memories, and as a full-time mom, witnessing her child’s first milestones makes all the challenges worthwhile.
“Regardless, I never want to miss those moments,” she said.
Grace firmly supports all homemakers, even those who are single or still students, saying she hopes people do the best for their families. For women who want to follow in her footsteps but fear strong opposition, she offers some candid advice.
“At some point, you have to live for yourself,” she said, “and not be afraid of what others might say or think.”
In her eyes, choosing to be at home is more attractive than pursuing a career. Serving her husband and children brings about sweet memories, and as a full-time mother, witnessing her child’s first milestones makes all challenges worthwhile.