Putting down the phone is one thing, but staying away from it is another. Dr. Clifford Sussman, a pioneering psychiatrist, has offered some surprising advice to patients trying to break free from screen addiction: join a rock band.
It’s not about the therapeutic effects of playing music, but the fact that you have to put down your phone in order to perform. And then, something magical happens.
After a few days of living without social media, endless scrolling, or gaming, many people have found that their sleep quality improves, their minds are less scattered, and they realize just how much attention screens have been devouring.
Yet, the real world quickly creeps back in. You might find yourself in line at a store, unconsciously reaching for your phone, or discovering it sneaking back into your bed, or intending to check a news app for a quick look and losing 45 minutes without even realizing it.
This significant psychological gap helps explain why digital detox often doesn’t last. The true challenge lies not just in putting down the electronic screens, but in changing the habits and reward mechanisms that lead us back into the cycle of addiction.
“Detox therapies often treat the screen as the problem, and abstinence as the solution,” says Dr. Judson Brewer, an addiction psychiatrist, neuroscientist, and author of “The Craving Mind,” in an email to The Epoch Times. “However, the key to habits lies not in the substance itself but in the reward-based learning cycle behind it.”
Many people reach for their phones when feeling bored, lonely, or anxious. Over time, the brain begins to associate these negative emotions with the instant comfort the phone can provide.
“Your brain has learned that picking up the phone can efficiently distract or stimulate you,” Brewer says. “You are not weak-willed; your brain has been trained to be efficient at this.”
Learned habits become harder to overcome because after experiencing digital detox, people return to environments saturated with digital signals. Notifications, phone vibrations, autoplay videos, and endless streams of information not only remind people to check their devices but also reinforce the very habits they are trying to break.
Unlike many other addictive behaviors, the allure of digital signals is nearly unavoidable, as phones and screens have become intertwined in all aspects of daily life.
Dr. Anna Lembke, addiction medicine director at Stanford University School of Medicine and author of “Dopamine Nation,” points out in an email to The Epoch Times, “Like Pavlov’s dogs, we salivate at the addictive stimuli and then must exert enormous willpower to resist.”
“These addictive factors themselves release dopamine in the brain’s reward pathway, making breaking the addiction unusually difficult.”
As one of the first to identify and treat internet gaming addiction, Dr. Sussman told The Epoch Times, “People have a tendency to slide back into old habits, but that doesn’t mean digital detox is pointless.”
Even just a few days away from highly stimulating digital content can create enough psychological distance for people to realize how automated their screen habits have become.
However, unlike complete abstinence from electronic screens, most people eventually need to reintegrate technology into their lives for work, education, and daily activities. So, what’s next?
Experts say this is where the real challenge begins and the key to lasting change lies.
When working with patients looking to change their screen habits, Brewer encourages them to approach their behavior with curiosity.
He doesn’t have patients forcefully suppress the urge to scroll but guides them to observe their impulses without judgment, noting what satisfaction they expect to derive from the behavior and whether the actual outcome aligns with those expectations.
“They often find that the actual reward is far less satisfying than what the brain predicted,” Brewer says. “This gap between expected and actual reward is key to updating the learning pathways.”
For example, someone might pick up their phone to alleviate boredom or anxiety, only to find themselves more restless, low-spirited, or drained 30 minutes later. Noting this disparity – what triggers the impulse, what they hope to gain, and how they actually feel – gradually weakens the grip of this habit.
“Breaking habits isn’t about brute force; it’s about clearer awareness,” Brewer says.
Raising awareness can weaken the pull of a habit, but simply raising awareness is not enough to fill the time and attention that scrolling once occupied.
One of the most confounding experiences during a digital detox is realizing how much idle time screens have devoured – waiting for coffee, eating alone, breaks at work, or tossing and turning unable to sleep at night. Once these habits are disrupted, many people find themselves facing plenty of idle time they’re not sure how to fill.
This is the idea behind Sussman’s unconventional advice to “join a rock band.” He encourages patients to further develop existing interests rather than trying to completely reshape themselves. The goal is not just to eliminate the source of stimulation but to find other activities that truly bring fulfillment.
He notes that the most effective alternatives are not grand self-improvement projects but activities that involve social interaction, hands-on participation, and a certain level of planning and organization. These activities can counterbalance mindless, passive phone scrolling. This may involve joining a sports club, volunteering, taking art classes, cooking with friends, spending more time with others without letting electronic devices dominate the interactions.
Even those who successfully change their screen habits may find that willpower alone is not sustainable. Someone who goes a whole week without social media might find themselves endlessly scrolling after a stressful day.
This is why Lembke recommends “self-binding” – setting actual physical or technical barriers between individuals and the electronic products they are most prone to misuse. This could mean charging phones outside of the bedroom, removing social media apps from the home screen, limiting screen time to specific periods of the day, or creating device-free spaces during meals and sleep.
“We need to create an environment in the dopamine-overloaded world that isolates us from triggering factors that constantly lure us to use,” Lembke says.
Support from others is equally crucial. For many, this support begins at home. Family members or partners can provide assistance by setting common boundaries, such as not using phones during meals or keeping phones out of the bedroom. Parents can lead by example, establishing habits they want their children to adopt, as family norms are often more effective than rigid rules imposed solely on children.
“People around you need to understand that this is a difficult struggle,” Sussman says. “Otherwise, you’ll eventually end up back in the same place.”
Currently, support systems for technology abuse issues are far less mature than those for alcoholism or gambling, for example.
“There aren’t many places where people can practice what to do after abstaining from addiction,” Sussman says.
Sussman assists patients through group activities during the challenging stages of behavior change. For example, his “DigiMotor Game Therapy” combines video games with physical activity to help children re-engage with screens without falling back into past usage patterns.
“This therapy aims to strengthen children’s executive functioning, exercise the prefrontal cortex, and help them gradually shift toward activities with lower dopamine stimulation,” he says.
People trying to change their screen habits often revert to old patterns: deleted apps are reinstalled, and after a stressful week, evenings are spent endlessly scrolling, slipping back into familiar routines they thought they had overcome.
“Relapse is part of the behavior change process,” Sussman says. “What’s important is understanding what triggers a relapse and how quickly you can bounce back.”
A healthier tech lifestyle isn’t achieved through a single weekend of complete detox. It requires gradual establishment: by raising awareness, developing better daily routines, creating a supportive environment, and constantly adjusting the course along the way.
Our goal is not to live a phone-less life but to create one where the phone is no longer the automatic solution for every downtime moment.